Friday, 27 February 2009

Multi-Dating My Foot

Truth be told, I cant crack this multi-dating thing...that's the update.

How are you my very own peoples. I must first pay homage to whom homage is due. I say thank you for counting me worthy enough to still come round and read my rants even though I have been slack in my duties of timely updates and blog rounds. I also wanna say a massive thank you to those who have made my buddy RocNaija to feel rather welcome to our family. Kudos also to the brains behind Naija Bloggers Award. Una do well.

My adept followers will know about my resolve to go multi-dating in order to find THE ONE. Well Stop Press: Parakeet is still very much single. The multi-dating thing has not worked for two plausible reasons, one because I actually never got round to doing it and two because I just don’t get attracted to guys no more. Ehn…I don’t get attracted to girls either before you start thinking all those naughty thoughts. Even though I agreed to give both leggedese benz and mercedes benz brothers a chance for a date with moi, I just couldn't bring myself to follow up after such dates. There was just no motivation or energy even though for the most part these guys are perfect gentlemen.

I have decided to give up on dating and give up on men until I can reasonably start to 'feel' again. At least am not doing what most women do and blame men for my woes. I am just putting my hands up here to say that I am emotionally barren at the moment and no need leading a guy on who may just happen to have genuine interest. In the meantime though I shall be searching for answers as to why and how I got here. Has anyone out there been here before? Do we have a shrink in the house whom Parakeet may just speak to?

A girl needs some help here. I'm out in peace. Be back soon so have a great weekend everyone.

31 comments:

RocNaija said...

*Runs in glances over his shoulder*

First??

FIRST!!!!

Yay!!

RocNaija said...

Hmmm.. looks like a lot of indepth self thought has been going on right there...

"Lie down on the couch girl.. Tell me your sorrows.."

I guess we all get to a phase where it all just seems bleak or doesn't make sense.. But the sun always shines after the storm..

The 'hard part' is how to keep going when you're going thru a sticky patch..

And.... that's when you need the Roc's couch *wink*

simeone said...

fursst

simeone said...

hmmm..i think you should just take ur tym...put "other" things right within you and with yourself..you come good..

Rita said...

"Emotionally barren"...This is a new one for me

I agree with you that you take sometime off. Leave emotions aside. When one guy slowly crawls into your life and loves you in a way that makes you love him so hard, the emotions will come back.

That was how my mom got married. When all "love" was gone...

Take care

Qube The Wordsmith said...

first!!!!!yipeee!!!!!
ok I'm calm...
You can always talk to me..

Afrobabe said...

I am actually a psychologist and sister Parakeet I think the way out is lots of sex...something tells me it will sort you out sharpish..
now the trick is to get a man who is well endowed and knows howto use what he's got.....

A trial will convince you.

Dabizniz said...

Sex answers nada...
If you connect on a friendship level where you do begin to love his company then you might see yourself opening up emotionally.

Serial dating does not help either

LUMIDEE said...

Wow..what a blunt assesment of self..Good job.Guess we all av experienced this same sort in time past and admitin to it is one step forward,luckily enuff your sensitive enuff as not to lead some cool dudes on..A + for you there..Hope your barren emotion would fizzle out when you meet a cool dude like me...Yippeee...Just messin with ya..NIce WriTe up tHough..KeEp 'em ComING!!!

LUMIDEE said...

Wow..what a blunt assesment of self..Good job.Guess we all av experienced this same sort in time past and admitin to it is one step forward,luckily enuff your sensitive enuff as not to lead some cool dudes on..A + for you there..Hope your barren emotion would fizzle out when you meet a cool dude like me...Yippeee...Just messin with ya..NIce WriTe up tHough..KeEp 'em ComING!!!

Funms-the rebirth said...

uve already identified whats wrong so u dont need a shrink, but on the other hand i can give u a 2 for 1 coupon so come see me...... its good to take time off....focus on enjoying being single, when ur emotionally fertile, u'd start feeling the attraction so dont force it.... ma gbadun
erm, r u sure u wanna listen to afro?

tobenna said...

*cough*cough*
Ehm, are you asking if I've ever been emotionally barren? Ever given up on women?
Hell NO!
Cannot happen. I'm sorry. Not like I use my emotions with them though.

Good idea.
Back off a bit until you start to feel again.

Writefreak said...

Babe, i think you're on the right path!
Take your time out, focus on God, and other things...do things you love and you'll see how love will just creep in...

Me i was not for the multi dating before..lol

Lol at emotionally barren!

Writefreak said...

Babe, i think you're on the right path!
Take your time out, focus on God, and other things...do things you love and you'll see how love will just creep in...

Me i was not for the multi dating before..lol

Lol at emotionally barren!

H2O-works said...

@Afrobabe...hahaha sex abi??? so that is why u have been smiling all over the place ehn....lol

My dear Parakeet...1st I must say it's been a while since I dropped a comment here..I have been reading the infrequent posts tho..lol...I wud suggest u stop searching 4 dat right guy to date, focus on making urself the right woman for urself and the person to complement ur rightness would come along in due time.

PS: I don't think you r emotionally barren sha...:)

Danny Bagucci said...

err... in addition to my Bagucci shoe line, I happen to also run a very successful e-shrink service.. as per blogville levels, we will consider a nominal fee to cover (wo)man - hrs of support staff onnly...... lol

Afronuts said...

Hmm...
I think you're trying too hard.

Here's what I recomend - quit looking for The One. Start looking for yourself. Build yourself, do all you can to make yourself the Nigerian dream woman and the right man will come after you.

Like attracts like.

Start becoming the type of person you'd want The One to be, focus on yourself rather than on guys, fraternize with the responsible ladies who have found The One, then watch what happens.

Afronuts said...

oh...and dont mind Afrobabe.
All you end up getting if you do that is a broken heart, total emptiness and the clap.

Sex never solves problems outside marriage..it only increases them

Afrobabe said...

You guys are underestimating the power of sex oh...

Temite said...

Well Afro has a point o, my sister. On the other hand, you seem to know the best thing to do. I get that way too, you just need a break so you can miss having love again. Your heart should want to love so dont force it. XOXO

Buttercup said...

awwww...u r doing the right thing by taking ur time..no good thing comes easy..u'll be fine sweetie!

Ms Sula said...

I think it's normal to take a break from it all at some point. It's actually even healthy.

Without realizing, we've spent a major party of our adult life "dating". And sometimes a break is just what the doctor ordered.

I remember taking such a break meself. My 2006 dating life was just too much and I was EXHAUSTED. Breakups, hookups, broken engagement all of this in one year. So I decided to walk away from dating (and sex) for a good minimum of 6 months. I would go out with guys who asked me out but as friends and let them know I was not looking for a relationship. Some left, others stuck and we're now friends. I focused on me. Doing what I like, improving at work, working out. Allathat. It was really refreshing.

So I encourage you dear.

ShonaVixen said...

LOL@Afro....this ur psychology, hmmmm...lol!!I will just say Parakeet, I've been there or rather am there at the moment and am enjoying me, loving me and making the most of this time!I'm just not feeling any1 @ the moment and loving it, but ts got me wondering if i'll get out of this phase though...
Have a great weekend hon xxxx

ibiluv said...

i'm with Dabiniz

erm i change my mind-i'm with Sis(Afro)

erm ok- i chit again Ibi says stop bothering/thining/fretting about it

the best relationshps fall into our laps-yea when we aren't actively looking..........

shag him all u want when you find him.......but do remember to be friends with him first

rethots said...

...you sure know you can talk to me. I listen.

Tigeress said...

You could always talk to me darling. lol! http://thecounselorandherthots.blogspot.com/

I reckon you feel that way only becos you just havent seen anyone worth your while and you're not desperate enof to settle. Plus u can deal with being single- no biggie n'it? :)

Nice Anon said...

lol lots of sex ke? She has to like again to sex no be so?

kmplx said...

gots to be done... good luck! because it is now, that you have decided you no want, that many will come. (kinda like waiting for ages for a bus, and once you decided to start walking, 5 zoom past you). just remember to come out of it when you need to. :)

Parakeet said...

@Roc…I guess that's ur first. Now to better talk, this place I am is not sticky o, its rock hard but then I gat consolation in your couch. Double wink **
@Simeone…sorry love you missed the first spot. I feel you about putting other things right within me but a girl is allowed to wish init?
@Rita…put that phrase in Parakeet's dico…yea I know it’s a strong phrase to use but then you know me and over dramatic. Thanks for the advice and of sharing that info on your mum.
@Qube…hmm, when do we start?
@Afro…I hear you my sister. Sex answereth all things, lol.
@Dabiniz…really? Lets face it. Most guys no dey wan do all that friendship thing these days. Makes it all the more difficult. Only in London have I seen friendship with touchy feely. Nonsense upon ingredient. But def serial dating don’t help. Too much wahala.
@Lumidee…your names sounds familiar. Name of an artist I guess, One hit wonder artist. You know if I don’t tell myself the truth who will. Cool dude…now that sounds suspicious, wink*
@Funms…I dey gbadun this your rebirth sha. True talk.
@Tobe…Hmm, so what do you use with women then? How's married life my brother?
@Writefreak…Focus on God, hmm. I still dey vex for now. Lol.
@H2O…I understand dear friend. I'm not searching actually. I just felt I shud put a bit more effort since I've been so complacent but as it is it looks like I shudn't even put anything. So you don’t think am emotionally barren abi? See of late I heard that an ex said some bad stuff about me and normally I would have raked for him but now I didn’t even feel angry. Is that not emotional barreness?
@Danny…loving that name Bagucci. So when do we go into business?
@Afronut…God I dey always fear your advice. You too dey talk stark truth but I love you sha.
@Afro…no mind them jare, lol.
@Temite…Miss having love, now that's new. Thanks sis.
@Buttercup…thanks ojare. Lets hope I don’t wait in vain.
@Ms Sula…6 months no sex…cough cough. Lets see if I can do it sha. Your 2006 sounds like my 2008. God help us.
@Shona…I wonder too o. If I'll ever get out of this yeye phase. See you soon sis.
@Ibiluv…only you one. I do love you.
@Rethot…sure the ever constant voice of reason
@Tigeress…Will definitely go read. Ye, I reckon when the right person comes allong all these will be history.
@Nice Anon…long time o. yea but I do like sex so that wont be a problem at all. Lol.
@Kmplx…Abi o. I hate that thing ehn. God help us.

wordmerchant said...

I see me and you both are knocking on the same door for answers...i don't know the answer my darling, all i can say is that it sucks big time.

However the advise i have been given is to find out by myself why i feel no feelings...pretty much useless at the moment because i am blank emotionally

Hope ur keeping well xx

doll said...

Maybe its ur time of the month. LOL