Thursday, 19 March 2009

First Anniversary

Yeeeeeeee, I did it albeit lazily. Clocked a year and over 50 posts in blogville. Now clap for me everyone. Its been real fun and I've made some fantastic friends virtually and even taken some into the real world. Thanks all for making this such a worthwhile experience for me and for letting me face one fact that I've refused to accept in a while. I can be complacent in a lot of ways. I secretly call myself 'daku-daji' blogger and yet am not contrite. I guess this is me and I can only just do what I can do. Hmm...I give up on myself.

I dont really have anything to post today but I just wanna share a lesson that I learned in a rather hard way. A man will do what a man will do. Forget love or commitment. Some of you may feel am taking a hardline on the matter but the truth is that men are just men. They make decisions devoid of emotions. They look at practicalities, what will work for them and what wont. If you are that woman who just happens to be in their life at a wrong time, no matter how much they profess love, they're still going to do what they are going to do, mostly without you in the grand scheme of things. Some sisters know this already but for those who dont please take note. Do everything for yourself. Let a man meet you where you are happy to me be met. Dont tailor your life and decisions to sync into the life of your SO well until he actually makes you his wife.

Where did all these come from? I had long suspected this was the case but love no dey gree me see road, lol. However watching the Nigerian movie Reloaded just confirmed all my suspicions. One of the characters played excellently by Stephanie Okereke dedicated 7yrs of her life to a man, had six abortions for him and yet he simply refused to marry her claiming he didnt have the means to support a family. Yet he goes out there and impregnates another woman whom he promptly made preparations to marry. This movie is a must see for all women because it's loaded with vital lessons one must take through the whole dating game and even into marriage.

I leave you with peace and love.

35 comments:

ShonaVixen said...

am i first!!!!!!!

ShonaVixen said...

Daaaang...blog owner approval is the problemo here!!! so i might be 50th for all i know!!!
Congrats hon on your 1 year on Blogville!!!!!
and well, men will be men!!!

ShonaVixen said...

yes I AM FIRST ON YOUR FIRST ANNIVERSARY...

LG said...

congrats on ur blog-anniversary dear'
any cake??? :-)

RocNaija said...

Top five for the Roc?!

Hmmm.. Lemme guess..

You been watching youtube like a few other people on here right?!

Tigeress said...

Shona this is inside info. We know why u're 1st. Cheating!

Parakeet omo pupa! lol! I'm sure u're wondering where i got that from. Happy anniversary me dear.

Let me go and read.

RocNaija said...

Opps.. And congratulobia on the One year anniversary!!

Tigeress said...

OMD Parakeet, i so agree with u on "Dont tailor your life and decisions to sync into the life of your SO well until he actually makes you his wife." Ladies, Parakeet has spoken very wisely. Listen o!

Frankie Rose said...

Happy anniversary!

Ummm I think i'm going to go find that movie. Thanx for the post!

Writefreak said...

Congrats on your one year anniversary!
I've seen Reloaded, it's a good movie though some parts of it didn't work for me! No woman should tailor her life to suit a man! True talk...after the ring is on, you can make all the necessary adjustments!

JustDB said...

Congratulations on your anniversary.... I think we should make it a standing rule that on every anniversary there should be a vera-esque question and answer session......or a blogference!

Temite said...

YES!
Congratulations on your first year anniversary. Oh and no one should tailor their lives to the other person if the other person is not willing to tailor his life to yours.

Favoured Girl said...

Congrats on your blog anniversary! And what you said about men is spot on!

Nice Anon said...

na today? We all know that. Men can be fickle minded. Only a man can date a girl for 6 years then heads down to florida for a vacation only to meet a girl there and wife her ass up in less than 2months. That is why they say marry a man when he is very excited about marrying you. Don't wait till he starts finding little things that is wrong with you. very soon na yawa go gas!

wordmerchant said...

happy blogversary!!!! i am with lg, where is the cake.

Like B said..if you want it you gonna have to put a ring on it!!!

Miss Definitely Maybe said...

congratulations on your anniversary
am not a big fan of nigerian movies but will look out for this one

Ms Sula said...

Congrats on your 1-year anniversary!

Re: women and sacrifices.Nobody should do anything based on anybody's lifeline but their own.

Maybe I'm selfish, but I'll be dead if I put someone's needs before my own... and that goes for most people not just lovers.

It really is common sense though... Flight safety measures kinda thing. You can't really help anyone if you don't have your own oxygen mask on your face. Do you first and the rest will fall into place.

My problem is this: don't lump all men in the same category. Men (like every human being) will only give you what you give yourself and/or demand for yourself...

Treat yourself the best and the rest of the world will follow suit.

Afrobabe said...

Congrats babe....shocking you always come back after abandoning it for ages...

The character I loved most in reloaded was the crazy wife...maybe cos her personlity fitted me the most...I could really see myself in her...I could easily be her...but the funny part is it would have been fun chasing him all over town and beating up and kidnapping women...hehehhehe

Buttercup said...

congrats on ur anniversary! wish u many more! its been nice knowing u! :D

i've been hearing bout this movie..must see it sometime..

btw, i've been meaning to ask, sometimes i just suddenly remember ur cousin..any word from her yet???

Repressed One said...

I like this "If you are that woman who just happens to be in their life at a wrong time, no matter how much they profess love, they're still going to do what they are going to do, mostly without you in the grand scheme of things..."

Food for thot indeed.

Congrats on your 1st blogyear!

Parakeet said...

@Shona...Yeee...ur first, what a feat, lol. Yes o men will always be men and we just have to know them for who and what they are.
@LG...thanks, are u offering to make one? Wink*
@Roc...yea, youtube all the way. I feel sad that am one of those killing Nollywood.
@Tigress...yes o. You berra tell me where u got omopupa from. Maybe in my second life sha.
@Roc...thanks.
@Tigress...thanks jare.
@Frankie...you welcome. Good movie.
@Writefreak...yea u right. Parts of it were a bit far-fetched.
@JustDB...u be the original word merchant. lol
@Temite...thanks darling
@Fgril...thanks. How's the writing going?
@Nice Anon...you do live up to your name. You speak wisdom nicely.
@Word...yes o. Challenge those commitment phobes.
@MDM...never used to like Nija movies before but I've seen some really good ones lately and Reloaded is def one of them.
@Ms Sula...you too full of wisdom. Love you sis and thanks for those words.
@Afrobabe...abi. I need you to motivate me more sha. You always seem to condone my laziness when we talk. Mscheew. Lol. So you see yourself being that housewife ehn? Hypertension is all I can say, lol.
@Buttercup...thanks babes. Same here. Not heard from my coz. I know she's alive sha cos if she was dead I would have heard. My strong suspicion is that she's been done for drugs or fraud either here or in the Netherlands.
@Repressed...thanks. And I like your name. So are you bringing out all those repressions through ur blog. Will sure go find out.

LusciousRon said...

Happy anniversary! Any cake? Wish you many more.
Lesson taken!

ShonaVixen said...

Just to say I watched RELOADED last nite and loved it!!!That Van Vicker.........

doll said...

happy first anni...

As for men...well never take them at face value....easier said than done tho

O'Dee said...

Congrats daku daji blogger, you made it to 1 year.

Its very important to have something for yourself & not be hanging on to a man and b saying he is ones life.

Funms-the rebirth said...

yay u made it......... congrats! ur so right, a man will do what he wants to do. its unfortunate women never seem to realise it before its too late. I learnt it the hard way and im grateful for the experience..off to look for d movie

Tigeress said...

I have to watch this reloaded movie. I'll buy it tomorrow. anyway, i've actually updated- dont know why its not showing in blog rolls? http://thecounselorandherthots.blogspot.com/2009/02/fighting-temptations-no-more-sheets.html

Zena said...

Congratulations o your anniversary

I'm rushing to go see the movie and you are right, a man will do what he can do

I love your blog

mizchif said...

Right on! I saw that movie, and while i laughed soo hard at some parts of the movie, it really, really got me thinking.

Congrats on your anniversary!

bumight said...

congratulations on the year anniversary!

also, i'd be wary of taking "life lessons" like this from movies, especially naija movies!

ibiluv said...

will look out for it

7 abortions is madness

she told him-i'm a mat.....step on me

congrats dear

stay here-keep posting

StandTall-The Activist said...

Congrats dearie!

Nigerian movies stuck but well they try to play out reality in thier own way. My opinion about this kind of thing is, for us women to be clear that any sacrifice we make for men shd be cuz we are doing it for ourselves and not for him and for us to be able to move on no matter what. And of course to be careful about the kind of sacrifice we are making

aloted said...

is this movie on youtube? will check it out...

congrats on ur 1st year anni...enjoyed reading from u..

u r very right about men o- the BEST of MEN are still MEN at their BEST

Tigeress said...

Hey! you’ve been given an Honest Scrap award in my blog The art of kissing and Honest Scrap Meme. Don’t ask me what the award is but check it out.

Tininu said...

omg you have watched reloaded toooo, i think that film is the best film ever. why normal(slow)girls might see it and be like men are bastards, mature and intelligent ones like you see it and think, what kind of idiot can be with a guy for 5 years and a couple of abortions as the guy has no job and sit at the joint to watch soccer with his agbero friends and will still wait till she reaches 7 years and 6 abotrions before they dump her....stupid woman...hisss!!